6.01 - New and Improved Lorelai

Dialoghi trascritti da TWIZ TV.COM

LUKE'S DINER
[Continued from last season. It is dark. Lorelai sits at the table as Luke paces frantically.]

LUKE: She is not dropping out of school. This was her dream. I am not going to let this happen.

[Lorelai gazes at him adoringly.]

LUKE: What?

LORELAI: Luke, will you marry me?

LUKE: What?

LORELAI: Luke. Will you -

LUKE: Yes.

LORELAI: Well, you don't have to answer so -

LUKE: Yes.

LORELAI: Well, you can take a minute to -

LUKE: No.

LORELAI [takes a deep breath]: So, what.... now?

LUKE: I don't know. This is new for me.

LORELAI: Well, we should do something. Official.

LUKE: Official.

LORELAI: Yeah. Something to commemorate the moment. I mean, we're getting married. Luke. Married. You and me. Luke table-for-one Danes and Lorelai I'm-sorry-can-I-get-an-industrial-forklift-for-my-emotional-baggage Gilmore are getting - married. Huh?

[They stand, awkward and shocked, for a moment.]

LUKE: We could toast.

LORELAI: Toast! Yes. Toast! Good. What'll we toast with?

LUKE: Uh - [He walks around the counter to look for a beverage.]

LORELAI: I mean, I know you won't have champagne, but maybe some wine or beer or something?

LUKE [from the kitchen]: Nothing, I've got nothing!

LORELAI: No, you must have something!

LUKE [OS]: Grapefruit juice and worcestershire sauce.

LORELAI: Neither sounds very festive.

LUKE [emerging from the kitchen]: I could cut it with some festive ketchup.

LORELAI: No, we need something sparkly. [She thinks for a moment.] Come on.

[She grabs his hand and pulls him toward the door.]

LUKE: Huh? Where are we going?

LORELAI: To Funkytown.

LUKE: No, hey, wait!

[They stop.]

LORELAI: What? Did you change your mind? Oh, how did I screw it up so fast? Was the Funkytown thing too quippy, 'cause I thought you liked that about me, but -

LUKE: No, the Funkytown thing was fine. I just - [He sighs] - Are you sure you want to celebrate now? I mean, a minute ago, when you came in here -

LORELAI: I just want to be happy right now. Okay?

LUKE [nods]: Okay.

LORELAI: Good. Now, come on!

LUKE: Where are we going?

[They exit.]

STARS HOLLOW TOWN SQAURE
[The bike race is finishing up. Kirk is massaging a biker's leg at the First Aid table.]

KIRK: Hey, am I doing this right?

BIKER: What?

KIRK: Never mind.

TAYLOR [shouting]: That's great, Grandpa, take your time! I have no home life. [He checks his watch.] Six hours I've been standing here waiting for this ridiculous race to end! - Okay, that's it! Race is over! Maggie, I want you to start breaking all this stuff down. If I don't get these tables back by midnight I pay for another day.

MAGGIE: But we haven't given out the trophies to the winners yet!

TAYLOR: Oh, who cares about giving out the trophies? There's no-one here to see the winners get them, except the losers, who I'm sure could give a rat's tushie if the winners get a trophy or not!

MAGGIE: Okay, so do I put them back in the bubble wrap, or -

TAYLOR: Just - just give it to me. [Calling out] Hey, who was first?

BIKER #1: Here.

TAYLOR [tosses him the trophy]: Congratulations. Who's second?

BIKER #2: Right here.

TAYLOR: Here. [Tosses the second trophy.] Third. [He hands the last trophy to a random biker.]

BIKER #3: I wasn't third.

TAYLOR: Rat's tushie, party of one... Okay, everybody, listen up! I want this square packed up and cleared out in ten minutes! [He notices Lorelai and Luke standing at the door of the market.] Hey, we're closed! The market is closed! What is wrong with people tonight? [He walks over to them.]

LUKE [looking in the window]: It's closed.

LORELAI: Ugh. Small-town hours. I hate small-town hours! As soon as we get married we have to move.

TAYLOR: Hey, you two, what are you doing there?

LORELAI: Taylor? Great, we need to get in!

TAYLOR: We open at six tomorrow.

LORELAI: Okay, Taylor, listen. You're going to be the first one to hear the big news.

TAYLOR: Do I have to hear it now? I have so many things to -

LORELAI: Luke and I are engaged.

TAYLOR: You are?

LORELAI: As of just a few minutes ago.

TAYLOR: Well, what do you know? I thought there was a better chance of all four of the Beatles getting back together than you two ever calming down long enough to get engaged!

LORELAI: Yeah, well, wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles, right?

LUKE: Can you just open this door, Taylor?

TAYLOR: Well, what do you need in the store?

LORELAI: We need something to toast this moment with.

TAYLOR: Something alcoholic?

LORELAI: Yes.

TAYLOR [takes her by the arm]: You know, Lorelai, if you feel that you have to be drunk to be with him -

LUKE: Taylor, would you just open the door?

TAYLOR: All right.

[He takes out his keys and unlocks the door. They go in.]

DOOSE'S MARKET - INSIDE
[They enter the store. Taylor turns on the lights.]

LORELAI: Where do you keep the champagne?

TAYLOR [points]: Over there. Top shelf.

LORELAI: Where?

TAYLOR: Top shelf! Top shelf!

LORELAI: Here? [She points at the paper towel.]

TAYLOR: Well, I'm out of ways of saying "top shelf", Lorelai.

LORELAI [finds the champagne]: Oh. Taylor, it's five ninety-nine.

TAYLOR: It's inexpensive, yes, but you'll still get a buzz.

LORELAI: Luke, did you find anything yet?

LUKE: Nothing. No wine, no beer, no cooking sherry. It's like Dylan Thomas just blew through town.

TAYLOR: I'm sorry, these bikers wiped me out. They may look like health nuts but they knock it back.

LORELAI: Oh, Taylor, you have to have something!

TAYLOR: Lorelai, I'm sorry, but - oh, wait a minute! I think I have a case of Zima in the back.

[Taylor goes into the back room to find it.]

LORELAI: Really? [She does a little dance.] Luke! He's got Zima in the back, he's got Zima in the back!

TAYLOR [carrying the case, brushing dust off the top]: Yep. Babette had me stocking it for a while. I was using it as a stepstool but I'm sure it's okay.

LORELAI: We'll take it!

LUKE: Let's just drive to Woodbridge. They have a Liquor Barn there.

LORELAI: No, I don't want to drive all the way to Woodbridge! I want to celebrate now.

LUKE: But men aren't supposed to drink Zima.

LORELAI: Pay the man.

TAYLOR: You can forget the tax. Consider it an engagement present.

LORELAI: Thank you, Taylor! [To Luke] Come on, get the Zima.

[Luke pays Taylor and takes the box. They leave the store.]

STARS HOLLOW TOWN SQUARE
[Lorelai runs off with Luke trailing behind her. Taylor calls out orders.]

TAYLOR: Get those tables on the truck! Hustle, people, hustle!

LUKE [to Lorelai]: Where are you going?

LORELAI: I know the perfect toasting place.

LUKE: Far?

LORELAI: Which one of us is not getting into the romantic spirit?

LUKE: The one with a caseful of chick beer under his arm.

[They reach the gazebo. Lorelai chases away the bikers that are hanging around.]

LORELAI: Shoo. Shoo! Hi, shoo. [They are alone.] Here.

LUKE: Right here?

LORELAI: Right here.

LUKE: Okay. [He sets down the box and takes two bottles out of it.]

LORELAI: Okay, so... here's to us.

LUKE: To us.

[They toast. They are about to drink when all the lights go out.]

LORELAI: Taylor!

TAYLOR: The light guys go on golden time in five minutes!

LUKE: Taylor, turn the lights back on!

TAYLOR: Well, fine. Apparently there's an oil well in the middle of Stars Hollow that no-one told me about! Turn them back on, Budgie!

[The lights come back on.]

LORELAI: Okay. I believe we were right about - there.

[They clink their bottles together and drink. Luke puts his arm around Lorelai's waist.]

LORELAI: Really? [Luke nods.] You're going to kiss me now? [Luke nods again.] So incredibly predictable.

[They kiss.]

LUKE'S APARTMENT
[Lorelai and Luke are in bed. Lorelai is nearly asleep and Luke is sitting up, looking at his hands.]

LORELAI: Was this mattress always this comfortable?

LUKE: I think so.

LORELAI: 'Cause it seems so much more comfortable. [Pause.] We should drink Zima and have sex every single night.

LUKE: Okay.

LORELAI: Okay. Good night.

LUKE: Night. [Pause.] So when I said "what about the kids", I didn't mean "what about our kids". I mean, yes, obviously, what about our kids? But I didn't mean we had to have any kids. 'Cause we don't. But - we can, I just didn't want you to think that I was laying down some kind of a mandate. I mean, kids. It's plural, so it sounds like a lot. But we can just have one kid, one's fine, or more if you want more, or we don't have to have any kids. We could just get a plant.

LORELAI [sleepy]: What?

LUKE: Nothing.

LORELAI: Okay.

LUKE: I bought a house, Twickham house. I bought it for us. I don't have it anymore. I could probably get it back, but I just thought you should know. I bought it. For the kids, that we don't have to have. It's a big house, and we don't have to fill it up with kids, you know? We could, we could get furniture. Go shopping for a couch, or get some end tables. [He sighs.] I hat shopping for furniture. For me, kids are easier.

LORELAI: I love shopping.

LUKE: Go to sleep.

LORELAI: Mmkay.

LUKE: Is this really happening?

LORELAI [opens her eyes and smiles]: Yes. It's really happening.

[Luke smiles and lays down. Lorelai sits up suddenly.]

LORELAI: You bought a house without telling me?

LUKE: What?

LORELAI: A house? I mean, a house is huge!

LUKE: Yeah, I know, that's why I told you.

LORELAI: A house full of kids?

LUKE: No, a plant, don't forget the plant.

LORELAI: Please don't do that, okay? Or, any other address or life changing decisions? Please include me in!

LUKE: I will. I am. I'm sorry. I won't. [Pause.] I will.

LORELAI: Okay.

[They settle back down.]

LUKE: Sorry.

LORELAI: Kids would be good.

[Luke grins.]

LORELAI'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM
[Luke sits in the chair at the bottom of the stairs, flipping through a magazine.]

LUKE: How much longer?

LORELAI: [from upstairs]: Oh, sorry. There's a purse-shoe incident that's threatening the entire outcome of the ensemble. It's technical, you wouldn't understand.

LUKE: I don't want to understand, I want to leave. I'm starving.

LORELAI [OS]: Watch T.V.

LUKE: How is that a response to "I'm starving"?

[Someone knocks on the front door.]

LORELAI [OS]: Hey, why don't you answer the door? That would be fun for ya.

LUKE [gets up]: I'm not bored because I'm six. I'm bored because you told me to pick you up at seven, and it's eight-thirty. [He opens the door. It's Paris.]

PARIS: Who are you?

LUKE: Well, I'm -

PARIS: I need to talk to Lorelai. Where is she? [She marches in and calls out.] Lorelai! Where are you?

LORELAI [OS]: Who's that?

PARIS: It's Paris, and I need to talk to you right now! [to Luke] Who are you?

LUKE: Well, I tried to tell you -

LORELAI [coming down the stairs]: Paris! What are you doing here?

PARIS: Are you busy? Is this a bad time?

LORELAI: No, we're just getting ready to go out. It's fine. Um, have you met Luke?

PARIS [turns to Luke]: No.

LUKE: I'm Luke.

PARIS: Paris.

LUKE: Nice to -

PARIS [turns back to Lorelai]: Rory's quitting Yale. I just went to see her and she told me she's quitting Yale. Did you know about this?

LORELAI: Yes, I did.

PARIS: It's Logan. That Christopher Atkins wannabe is the reason that she's suddenly Blue Lagoon-ing it right out of school.

LORELAI: Paris -

PARIS: I don't understand. Why are you letting her do it?

LORELAI: I have no choice.

PARIS: Yes, you do. You can stop her. You can pull some of that supermom crap that you always do and get her to change her mind!

LUKE: Yep.

PARIS: Rory can't quit Yale! We have to do something!

LUKE: I agree.

PARIS: I mean, we should kidnap her. Drag her back here and tie her up and not let her loose until she listens to reason.

LUKE: Yes.

LORELAI [scolding]: Luke.

LUKE: Hey, my suggestion first.

PARIS: I need her to be at Yale. Rory has been my only real competition since she showed up at Chilton! She's the only one who has ever challenged me. She's my pace car. She's my Bjorn Borg. Without her, I'll get lazy. I'll fall apart. I'll have frosted hair and dragon-lady nails and I'll achieve nothing! I'll become my mother!

LORELAI: Paris. Listen to me. You are a very smart, driven young lady. You can be anything you want. Except a diplomat. You don't need Rory to push you.

PARIS: Rory's my only friend. She stays in the room until I'm completely done saying something. I need that.

LORELAI: Listen. I know I'm not Rory, but if you need to talk to someone you can always call me.

PARIS: Really?

LORELAI: Yeah. I mean, I'll give you my cell phone number. Basically my lifeline. You take it and you use it. [She gets up and writes down the number on a sticky note.]

PARIS: I can really call you?

LORELAI: Anytime, anywhere.

PARIS: I'm going to hold you to that.

LORELAI: It's not a threat, sweetie, if somebody makes the offer willingly.

PARIS [heads to the door]: Thanks. Sorry to bother you. Bye, Luke.

LUKE: Nice to meet -

[The door slams.]

LORELAI: And that concludes the floor show portion of the evening. I'll get my purse and we'll go. [She walks into the kitchen. Luke follows her.]

LUKE: So what are you going to do?

LORELAI: About what?

LUKE: You know about what.

LORELAI: Nothing.

LUKE: Come on.

LORELAI: Come on, let's just go!

LUKE: No. We haven't talked about this.

LORELAI: Because there's nothing to talk about.

LUKE: Yes there is.

LORELAI: Luke. This is Rory's decision, okay? She knew exactly how I felt about the situation, and she chose to ignore me. She chose to move in with my parents. She chose not to tell me about it.

LUKE: She's a kid.

LORELAI: She's not a kid! She's twenty. She's going to be twenty-one in October. She's been living on her own for two years now. She's not a kid.

LUKE: Okay, fine. But she's young.

LORELAI: And young people have to be allowed to make mistakes. I made a much bigger mistake than this when I was much younger.

LUKE: Oh, so what? Just because you made it on your own, Rory has to also?

LORELAI: That's not my point.

LUKE: Well, then, what is your point?

LORELAI: My point is that I wouldn't have listened to anyone in that situation, even if there was someone to listen to. I had to go through that and Rory has to go through this. Now, she's smart and she's strong. Hopefully she'll figure it out, but I am not going to force my way in! She wants to be on her own, fine, she's on her own.

LUKE: Really.

LORELAI [sniffs]: Tough love, baby.

LUKE: So that's it.

LORELAI: That's it.

LUKE: And you're okay with this?

LORELAI: I'm totally okay with this. Come on, let's go. I thought you were starving.

[They walk toward the door.]

LUKE: Did you give Paris your real cell number?

LORELAI'S HOUSE
[Lorelai enters. She walks into the kitchen and takes a bottle of water out of the fridge. She walks into Rory's mostly empty room, sits on the end of the bed and looks around, getting more and more upset. She throws the water bottle at the wall and starts to cry. After a minute, the front door opens and Luke calls out to her.]

LUKE: Full moon! Moment's here, let's go!

[Lorelai wipes her tears and goes out to meet him.]